I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
