I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Of course I have a pirate flag
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Randomize
