I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
