Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
