Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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