Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
