My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
