He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
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I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
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