you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
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