what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
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