I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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