You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
