she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
