Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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