this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
