she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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