but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
