Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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