i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
