I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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