When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
