if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize