I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize