four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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