Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
