Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
