i would punch a child for taco bell
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
