I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
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