a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
where are my eyebrows?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
