You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
