69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize
