you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize
