another moral hangover. fuck.
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
