you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
