i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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