so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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