I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
nutella sex= disaster
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
