How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
