Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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