as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
You need a sexual gate keeper
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
