I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
