JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
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