you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
