I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
