You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Randomize
