I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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