HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
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