I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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