it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
