I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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