so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
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i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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