so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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